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Dragon's Daughter - Part 1 by ~Laicristiel:iconLaicristiel:



The flames leapt to life. As each torch lowered to the straw covered roofs, another home erupted in fire, quickly eating away at the dry fuels. The sound of people screaming could be heard over the crackling of burning wood and the clattering of iron-shod hooves on the cobbled streets. As people ran, trying to escape the deadly flames, they were cut off by the black-clad warriors astride steeds of midnight. The people were quickly herded into small groups guarded by a few warriors, where they huddled together, fearful eyes reflecting the orange tongues of fire that slowly devoured their only home.
A young woman paused on the hill above the village to look back once, then turned away and resumed her panicked flight. Her dark brown hair, normally tied neatly back in an efficient bun was dragging itself loose, and fell in straggles around her face. Her eyes were filled with terror as she crested the hill, clutching her bundle to her breast.
To the edge of the forest she ran, her skirts clinging to her legs and threatening to trip her up. Silently, she swore that if she lived through this, never again would she wear a skirt, no matter what the other woman whispered. She reached the sanctuary of the trees and knelt slowly. Carefully, she laid the bundle down at the foot of a tree. She rose to her feet, casting a last glance down at the tangle of blankets, she turned and fled. As she again reached the top of the hill, she heard the muted thudding of hooves on grass, then the guttural shout as one of the figures spotted her. She turned, fear in her eyes to see him racing after her, froth flying from the mouth of his horse. Quickly, she spun around in the opposite direction from the woods and took off, running as fast as her legs could carry her. But the warrior quickly caught up with her, and with one strong arm, grabbed her roughly up and carried her across his horse’s withers back to the village. She chanced one look back behind her at the receding forest as she was carried back and a tear slid down her cheek as her sensitive ears picked up the faint sound of an infant’s cry.
©2004-2009 ~Laicristiel
:iconlaicristiel:

Author's Comments

I decided to break this up into a few parts, partially because otherwise it would take way too long to read, and this way I can make it look like there's more here. :D Anyway, this is the first part of a short story I wrote for my Freshman english class. It's mostly just starting to set things up a little. There's things I like about it and things I don't like about it, but I'm not going to say what they are because I don't want to influence you before you read it. Constructive Critisism is welcomed and appreciated.

Comments


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:iconlonelygiant:
ok finaly somthing i can actualy say somting about (writing being my fortay) first i would like the setting to be better set up.....the beging while interesting is some what abrupt id like to see some building to the attack on the town... on the good side i like how it some what drifts between firstperson and objective point of view (i know it really dosent for the most part but there are places where it seems to) um all in all good so far ill have to see the others to make any clear judgements
:iconevagenisis:
It's awesome! Leave it alone or Alucard will eat you brains!

--
If my heart broke into a million tiny pieces, would you pick them all up and save me? What if it meant you would lose me forever?
According to Humanforsale.com I am worth exactly $2,529,080. XD
:iconlaicristiel:
Thanks Gar! I'll probably put the next part up tomorrow sometime, or something. Again, thank you for your comments, I'll go back through it later with that in mind.
:iconlaicristiel:
Um, Jon, that kinda defeats the purpose of the "Constructive Critisism" comment.
:iconevagenisis:
No it doesn't, I win. :p

--
If my heart broke into a million tiny pieces, would you pick them all up and save me? What if it meant you would lose me forever?
According to Humanforsale.com I am worth exactly $2,529,080. XD
:iconlaicristiel:
no you don't. I win. I always win
:iconevagenisis:
Have you forgotten that I outrank you LILLUM? *stands tall*

--
If my heart broke into a million tiny pieces, would you pick them all up and save me? What if it meant you would lose me forever?
According to Humanforsale.com I am worth exactly $2,529,080. XD
:iconlaicristiel:
Only on SecondImpact, we're on DeviantArt now. MWAHAHA! Therefore I win.
:iconevagenisis:
No you don't, I stil outrank you.

--
If my heart broke into a million tiny pieces, would you pick them all up and save me? What if it meant you would lose me forever?
According to Humanforsale.com I am worth exactly $2,529,080. XD

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April 3, 2004
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